Clickbait 3

Here is more inanity from the sump-pump of the interwebs! The series continues. Don’t forget to look at Part 1 and Part 2!

Ah, the old Viking strategy. "Come with us in this longboat and get ye some concubines." "Arr, sounds good."

Ah, the old Viking strategy. “Come with us in this longboat and get ye some concubines.” “Arr, sounds good.”

4 of the regrets are the people touching her. The fifth is this picture.

4 of the regrets are the people touching her. The fifth is this picture.

"Manufacturers warning: KILLS blood pressure, not just reduces. May result in death, cessation of bodily function, passing beyond the veil. Consult your doctor to see if Arsenica is right for you."

“Manufacturers warning: KILLS blood pressure, not just reduces. May result in death, cessation of bodily function, passing beyond the veil. Consult your doctor to see if Arsenica is right for you.”

Multiply by 250,000. Easy.

Multiply by 250,000. Easy.

Step 1: Kidnap UFC fighter. Step 2: Euthanize UFC fighter. Now you have the body of a UFC fighter!

Step 1: Kidnap UFC fighter.
Step 2: Euthanize UFC fighter.
Now you have the body of a UFC fighter!

Holy crap, that guy was thirty 100 feet ago.

Holy crap, that guy was thirty 100 feet ago.

No, but we're great at causing headaches.

No, but we’re great at causing headaches.

Clickbait 2

As a followup to this post, here’s more inanity from the sump-pump of the interwebs. Enjoy!

1000 miles to the gallon. Your hamster is riding in STYLE.

1000 miles to the gallon. Your hamster is riding in STYLE.

His nickname on the street is "Shoplifter."

His nickname on the street is “Shoplifter.”

A revolutionary system called "exercise." Shh. It's not yet available in stores.

A revolutionary system called “exercise.” Shh. It’s not yet available in stores.

Dang it. I really enjoyed my morning boxing with pink boxing gloves.

Dang it. I really enjoyed my morning boxing with pink boxing gloves.

If you flip your house upside down, they start paying YOU. Foolproof.

If you flip your house upside down, they start paying YOU. Foolproof.

They call it the "corset-in-a-capsule."  Also "tombstone-in-a-tablet."

They call it the “corset-in-a-capsule.”
Also “tombstone-in-a-tablet.”

And no more happiness! Be off with you.

And no more happiness! Be off with you.

Clickbait

This is a series I’ve been contemplating for a while. As I collect more material, there will be followup posts. I hope you enjoy it!

Eat six eggs at a time and you'll ALWAYS be beautiful.

Eat six eggs at a time and you’ll ALWAYS be beautiful.

Holding a tiny jellyfish turns you into a MAN'S man.

Holding a tiny jellyfish turns you into a MAN’S man.

Step 1: Buy egg Step 2: Open egg Step 3: Remove $100 from egg and pay mortgage.

Step 1: Buy egg
Step 2: Open egg
Step 3: Remove $100 from egg and pay mortgage.

One is if you wake up with an unexplained oxygen tube in your nose. That's the first tipoff.

One is if you wake up with an unexplained oxygen tube in your nose. That’s the first tipoff.

Tees are rarely used! Same for golf balls!! Who knew!!!

Tees are rarely used!
Same for golf balls!!
Who knew!!!

They sell personalized Honey Boo Boo's. I'd love to see that business model.

They sell personalized Honey Boo Boo’s.
I’d love to see that business model.

If it wasn't secret.  Funny how you knew the date like that.

If it wasn’t secret.
Funny how you knew the date like that.

It almost makes you wonder how they make a profit, those goodhearted capitalists. Heh.

It almost makes you wonder how they make a profit, those goodhearted capitalists.
Heh.